See Stephen Colbert’s Yogurt-Covered Alex Jones Spoof
Stephen Colbert continued to tease radio host and noted conspiracy theorist Alex Jones on The Late Show on Tuesday night, mocking his macho bluster and his ongoing lawsuit with the yogurt company Chobani, which Jones has accused of “spreading crime and tuberculosis.”
Colbert parodied Jones by playing the ranting radio host Tuck Buckford, a frequent contributor to The Late Show in recent weeks. Buckford speaks in a growl, sniffs Sharpie markers, pounds his chest to emphasize key points and sees a left-wing plot in every shadow.
“I’m not going to roll over for Big Yogurt, the illumi-Chobani working to undermine the liberty of the American manscape,” Buckford asserted. “George Soros doesn’t want you to know the real value of yogurt: It’s a natural, protein-rich Gamma ray shield to keep the Clinton foundation from reading your dreams.”
To prove his point, Buckford then coated his head with yogurt. “Now they can’t read your mind,” he said. “You can’t get in here, John Podesta [Hillary Clinton’s campaign chairman]. I can’t even tell what I’m thinking – I have no idea why I’m doing this, because I can’t even read my own brain right now.”
Jones is currently fighting a child custody battle in court with his ex-wife. His lawyers are hoping to persuade the judge that Jones’ on-air persona is just an act, and that he’s a calm, civil presence fully capable of raising three children in real life.
But outside of the legal proceedings, Jones’ on-air tirades continue to provide Colbert with endless fuel for mockery. Tuck Buckford took full advantage of the comedic gold-mine, attacking fruit-flavored yogurt – “Why is the fruit on the bottom? What is it hiding?” – and asserting his uber-masculinity at every turn. “I’m more than a man’s man,” Buckford yelled. “I’m a man’s man’s man. I’m man cubed!”