Lily and All the Funny Women
Characters (In Order Of Appearance)
Richard Pryor, an actor/comedian
Some Critics: John Wasserman, Lee Israel, Bruce Vilanch, Horace M. Newcomb, an old woman, Peggy Clifford, a CBS executive, W.P. of Detroit, a young woman
Kay Whitlock, an activities coordinator at Southern Colorado State College, Pueblo
Mary Jean Tomlin, a storyteller
A Groupie/Reporter
A Diary
Lily Tomlin, another actor/comedian
Toni, a city girl of the Fifties
A Rubber Freak
Edith Ann, a small child
Mrs. Earbore, a Grosse Pointe matron
Mildred, a waitress
Harry, her boss
The Party Lady
Mrs. Fitzgerald, a childhood mentor
Mrs. Judy Beasly, of Calumet City, Illinois
Bernice Mason, a movie mag writer
This Astrologist
Wanda V. Wilford, a C&W singer
Janice Lou Reid, one of her fans
Wanda V.’s Manager
Loretta Lynn
Control Room Monitor
Part One
If You Can’t Be Direct, Why Be?
(In his room on the 14th floor of the Hyatt Regency in San Francisco, Richard Pryor props his bare feet on top of a table of leftover afternoon breakfast dishes and confesses to a secret passion.)
Richard I love Lily. I have a thing about her, a little crush. She’s so good I get embarrassed, I get in. awe of her. I’d seen her on Laugh-In and shit, and something about her is very sensual, isn’t it. You know, when she works, I’d like to ball her in all them different characters she does sometimes. Wouldn’t you? I mean, have her around the house and have her do all that — be Ernestine one minute.
(He imitates Ernestine, Lily’s telephone operator, his voice nasal and officious, interrupted by snorts.) “Oh (snort, snort) just put it in the proper place. Thank you (snort, snort).”
(Several critics speak up from various locations — newspaper offices, shopping centers, network inner sanctums, street corners, backstage dressing rooms, airports, etc.)
John Wasserman of the, ‘San Francisco Chronicle’ I would venture that Lily Tomlin is the first comedienne in history subject to audience lust.
Ms. Lee Israel in ‘Ms.’ Much of the low-key documentary style of performing she is moving toward can no longer appropriately be called comedy. Increasingly, she is simply lifting pieces from the culture, imposing upon them her overview and her mammoth talent, and then gingerly putting them down again.
Bruce Vilanch of ‘Chicago Today’ She transforms the tiny stage into a gigantic circus of women. She is not just a comic, she’s a comic actress.
Horace M. Newcomb of the ‘Baltimore Sun’ Her ear is as accurate at times as that of Mark Twain.
An Old Woman During a Performance (Shaking her cane and yelling) Go home and put on a brassiere!
Peggy Clifford of the ‘Aspen Times’ Her special was probably the most radical departure from television and comedic conventions we will see on the tube this season.
A CBS Executive Assessing the Special A $360,000 jerk-off.
W.P. of Detroit An hour of Lily Tomlin is 55 minutes too much. Miss Tomlin hit a new low ridiculing the president’s family.
A Young Woman I know this is going to sound crazy. I’m divorced now, but I was married for about three years. And the whole time we were married, honest to God, Lily, I don’t want this to sound neurotic or anything, but the only time, only good time we had to look forward to together, was Monday nights at eight o’clock.
(In the baggage claim area of the Denver airport, Mary Jean is surrounded by several students from Southern Colorado State College at Pueblo. They have come to drive her back to their remote desert town for a college-sponsored performance that night at Woodrow Wilson Memorial Hall. Among the students is Kay Whitlock, a 25-year-old woman with short hair and heavy-rimmed glasses.)
Kay You have no idea how we fought for you.
Mary Jean (Upset) What do you mean?
Kay Well, this guy, Gordon Brown, he wanted to have someone else. He didn’t think . . .
Mary Jean Who’s Gordon Brown?
Lily and All the Funny Women, Page 1 of 19